I didn't tell my boyfriend my age when we started dating. I worried he might end things

Lena and Kjetil say they too have talked about many of these same issues.

Something they have taken seriously is financial planning.

When they purchased their new home, they agreed Lena would invest more into the property in the short-term as she will retire sooner than Kjetil.

He will initially make smaller mortgage contributions, but by the time he retires they will have contributed equally to the property overall.

Such planning can be difficult but is important to figure out for couples with an age gap, according to relationship therapist, Sarah Louise Ryan.

"In the early stages of age-gap relationships there can be a lot of fire in the belly," Ryan says. "It's quite vibrant, it's exciting… But then when both people get older, and life differences can't be ignored, it puts a lot of pressure on the relationship."

Such couples need a retirement plan that makes sense in terms of money and timings, she advises. They should also figure out what caregiving might look like in later years.

As far as aging is concerned, Lena hopes for good health and trusts Kjetil won't have to "come visit me in my elderly home" anytime soon.

Long-term plans haven't featured in Kseniia's conversations with her husband Mikhail, beyond a few jokes he's made about growing old. He's 41 and she is 23.

"We're enjoying life in the moment and aren't thinking about what will happen in 20 years," Kseniia tells me from their home in Germany.

The couple met, also via a dating app, in their native Russia.

Both were initially worried about their difference in age, but soon bonded over their shared love of art, culture and detective movies.

Kseniia wasn't interested in dating people her age, whom she says spent their time clubbing, drinking and smoking. "I liked going to a museum, discussing politics and social issues, learning something new, and travelling to new cities and countries."

The more she got to know Mikhail, the more Kseniia realised they shared life goals and interests that "went much deeper than going to a museum and watching a movie together".

That became "the starting point for our family", she says. The pair married in 2022 before eventually settling in Germany.

Kseniia doesn't feel a power imbalance in their relationship but appreciates Mikhail has more experience of how the world works and feels she can learn from him.

But Kseniia does notice a generational difference in how they both communicate. She texts incessantly - sometimes sending more than 100 messages a day - while he prefers to speak on the phone, or in person.

Kseniia's friends and family have all been very accepting of Mikhail but she hasn't had much contact with his family because he doesn't have many close relatives left.

There are no imminent plans to have children, but the couple do want them in the future, and Kseniia isn't concerned about Mikhail's ability to keep up if he becomes an older father.

"Even though I'm younger, I think he has more energy. He's very active and doesn't like to sit still," she says. "We balance each other very well."

That sense of emotional balance is something Lena feels she has also found in Kjetil.

When she signed up to dating apps a few years ago, she had no specific intention to find a younger partner. On the dating apps she set her age preferences from 26-60.

"I was 42," Lena says, "at a place in life where I could date a man with grandkids or a man without kids - either was OK."

But the fact she and Kjetil clicked so well prompted her to encourage other women to consider dating outside their immediate age range too.

She began posting on social media about their life together and, despite a few negative comments, most responses have been positive.

Lena believes women should "stop feeling ashamed" and judging each other over personal decisions. She's had these feelings herself, she says, and overcome them.

She wants women to know they can find meaningful and lasting relationships with men they might have once discounted because of their youth.

Before her career in counselling and education, Lena used to work in an elderly care home and remembers a woman there who had a husband 17 years younger than her.

"He came to her with flowers everyday. He loved her still and I thought to myself: that is real love… I believe that age cannot take away love."